BTRIPP (btripp) wrote,
BTRIPP
btripp

OK, so you're getting this one ...

Yeah, I wrote about wanting to make LJ my "main channel" again, but it's so vague if people are seeing stuff here, that it's always easier (especially in the "couple of sentences" length - when I see the input box here, part of my brain starts thinking in terms of 2,000-3,000 words ala my reviews) to just punch that out over on FB.

However, I was going to bitch about something that I'm pretty sure nobody over there would give a damn about (OK, so probably nobody here does either), so you're getting it instead.

This has to do with paranoia, self-doubt, and an entire ocean of professional frustration (I can HEAR YOU clicking off this screen!) ... but it's just going to fester in my head if I don't get it spewed out in some form.

I had a handful of books that I had requested from some publishers this summer, which resulted in replies saying they'd be happy to send out the books when they were ready, which made me assume that my mailing info had gotten onto a list that would result in said books showing up here in due time (and, given that two of those were about the upcoming election - from authors that I've reviewed numerous times previously - "due time" was about a month or so back), and waited. And waited. And wondered WTF had happened.

If these books had been less "topical", I probably would have poked the responding promo department types to ask if the books were coming ... but since we're in the last few weeks before the election, I'm pretty much "over" the concept of reading books on Mr. Trump. This is too bad, as I was quite eagerly anticipating getting both of those read & reviewed by this point.

So, I'm feeling "left out".

I also had a bit of a confrontation with a fellow who has been intermittently doling out some career advice to me this weekend, when he was "suggesting" that if there is no audience for my books, why do I insist on still producing them. This dove-tailed into the missing review copies, as WHY would a publisher bother sending me a review copy if I have "no audience"? I'm just a useless sack of shit looking to scam free books, right? So, of course the books aren't getting sent to me. I'm BAD. I'm USELESS. I might as well be DEAD, as that would improve conditions for everybody involved.

I really hate what a massive pile of failure my life has played out as.

Sucks to be me.

I really ought to do something to rectify that situation.


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