BTRIPP (btripp) wrote,

So, where were we ...

OK, so maybe this time I have some sort of an excuse ... after my wailing and gnashing of teeth about not posting this stuff for a month, I promptly disappear for another week, but I can point to having been out of town over the holiday weekend (drove to Columbus, OH on Friday, visited with The Wife's family on Saturday, drove back home on Sunday ... yes, that thrilling) as one time-sink that was to blame! I guess part of my problem is that I still have a mental image of myself being "a regular LiveJournaler", from back in the days when I'd rarely miss a day of posting here, and would frequently have numerous posts per day. However, the combination of having to severely "edit myself" in terms of having an opinion on anything in interest of being the ideal bland zombie cog for what ever corporate machine that might be eventually considering hiring me, and ramping up my Twitter usage in my active job search (and my using that venue for my more trivial notations), has left LJ somewhat in the lurch ... reserved for originating book reviews and cross-posting stuff like my blitherings over on The Job Stalker.

Perhaps most notable about this weekend is that I did nothing (well, aside from some Twitter reading and link-snagging from there) on the Job Search. As I've noted, I am pretty much on a 24/7 cycle on that and it felt very strange to not be churning through stuff towards that end. Not "good", mind you (as anytime I reflected on the fact I dropped into panic and guilt), just "different". Unfortunately, it's pretty clear that my job search has exactly the same results if I do massive amounts of efforts or if I do nothing, and that is depressing.

Speaking of depressing, my current cobbled-together-from-parts "Frankenstein" machine is starting to look terminal. Over the past few weeks it's gotten into a habit of freezing up on me (at totally random times), requiring a hard re-boot. Needless to say, this has gotten me paranoid about saving stuff I'm working on (well, not paranoid enough, as I "lost" 8 hours of Twitter posts I was planning on reading this morning when it froze up overnight), but it's moved from freezing up every few days to needing to be re-booted 2-4 times a day now. There is an outside chance that I might be able to get my "old" (good) computer functioning (the one that died last December), as it maybe is having a "cable issue" instead of a "drive issue", which would explain why Ubuntu didn't recognize the new HD I'd gotten for it some months back. However, I have to be in a state of extreme emotional equanimity to be able to get into the guts of a computer, and I've not had that level of stability much of late. The other option, of course, would be to spend $$$ on a new system, $$$ that at least I don't think we have (The Wife, on the other hand, still spends money like the proverbial drunken sailor, hence our very expensive 8 hours with her family over the weekend, which, between car rental, gas, hotel, and several restaurant meals, no doubt cost more than 2-3 functional refurb machines or a decent new one!).

I have had a few "freelance" sort of things crop up ... unfortunately, the vast majority of them don't seem to go anywhere, which is making me half-way gun-shy to even bother following up on those sorts of contacts. One of the reasons that I've always avoided "Freelance" as a career path is that it's 90% sales and then with whatever time you have left in your waking hours you get to desperately try to get the damn work done. I've never had the thick skin necessary for sales, and get really sad/hurt/resentful when an assignment disappears on me ... I can only imagine how miserable I'd be if I was having to actively be out there trying to piece together a living from dribs and drabs of stuff. Sure, I'd be happy to have enough assignments that I was able to patch together an income from them (assuming they'd be coming in the door of their own accord), but the thought of having to pitch dozens of things for every actual paid assignment makes me want to curl up into a ball under my desk!

Anyway, over there ==> is the latest Job Stalker entry (so at least I've not gotten behind again!) from Thursday. It's actually what would have been Friday's content, but things got screwy with the holiday weekend. Always appreciate the clicky-clicky, as it's depressing to see nobody reading my stuff over there.

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Tags: thejobstalker
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