Today is my 20th wedding anniversary ... The Wife and I will be going out to dinner (thanks in large part to a Restaurants.com gift certificate) tonight, and exchanging token gifts.
Have I mentioned how much it sucks to have been as broke as we have for as long as we have? Had somebody told me 20 years ago that all we'd be able to afford to give each other in 2011 were sub-$20 gifts, I'd have been horrified (as back then I was a PR executive with a nice six-figure salary). Hell, I was fantasizing about our going on a trip to China ("china" being the traditional 20th anniversary gift) had we won the lottery, and I feel like such a sack of shit that all she's getting is a ceramic (it's not even "china" really) trinket box as a gift. Everything in my life these days is a barbed reminder of what a FAILURE I've become.
There had better be some big cosmic pay-off at the end of all this, because this life has turned into such a nightmare that I daily think what an idiot I was to quit drinking back in my 20's ... hell, I could have been DEAD 25 years at this point ... I think the world would have been better for it.