Do you miss my RANTS on religion/politics, etc.? I sure as hell do.
I am getting so scarred, so bitter, so locked into ANGER about this damn unending job search. It is literally KILLING me. I can't be ME. I can't do things that interest me. My days are endless grinds of researching possible jobs, cranking out applications (that I never hear anything other than the "decided to pursue an applicant at this time whose education and background would be a better fit for the position" boilerplate crap), going to networking event after networking event ... wasting YEARS ... YEARS ... of my life.
It is hard not to HATE the whole f'n world.
But, I can't express this. I have a family to support, so I CAN'T go write a book, or go back to school, or (at this point) start a business ... I have to be locked into the Sisyphusian agony of "looking for work" (which never comes).
When my last regular gig (Director of Communications for a Second Life developer) evaporated under me back in May of 2009, I thought I'd be looking for 5-6 months. It's now been 34+ months. Sure, some of those have had a bunch of Freelance/Consulting work in them, but nothing solid, nothing dependable, and frankly, most of them ended up paying me 20¢ on the dollar when the dust settled.
Anyway, I've had a bunch of stuff that I would have LIKED to have chatted about in here, but that "oh, no ... the HR people will be reading this!" filter kicked in each time. So I'm silent, with my guts being eaten away by the frustration and rage.
"If only all of Rome had just one neck."*