I feel like I'm trapped in some sort of Twilight Zone episode ... I can't get a job, we've burned through all our retirement and college funds, and I'm at the point where spending $3 on food at the 7-11 is a HUGE treat for me. Nothing I do moves us any closer to solvency. It's a nightmare that just doesn't end. I keep thinking that death would be a "merciful release" from what has become a decade or more of non-stop frustration, angst, and emotional agony.
It's gotten to the point where every day is a choice between the Gulag and a Catch-22 ... either I just keep TRYING to find a job (and what's the quote? "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.") or I do something "insane" to change the pattern. Either way, it's insanity. Hell, emotionally I feel more HOPEFUL about winning a lottery prize than I do in finding a job, and I know what the frick'n odds are for the lottery!
Sucks to be me ... and it has for a very, very, very long time. And I'm pretty sick of being in my skin.
{EDIT} - and, yes, I am aware of how nauseatingly ironic the title of the conference is in relation to all the above!
