Not that this is unusual, I exist in a "I'd prefer to be dead" funk most of the time.
However, this was something new ... not good, but a new form of bad.
I've been bummed about the Circus.
This is the time of year that I'd be scraping up money (being that I've been broke for a goddamn decade) to take The Girls to see the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus ... for the Friday morning show the day after Thanksgiving ... something we've done every year since they were very small.
This year, I just got done with a couple of freelance projects (and an opinion panel) and had the cash ... but there's no more Circus.
Which makes me sad.
There are not a whole lot of things in my life that don't make me feel like a sack of shit, and being able to take my daughters to the circus, and buy them some treats and souvenirs, was one of those few things that made me feel like I wasn't an anchor dragging their existences down.
Of course, at ages 21 and 17, they've not been particularly gung-ho about the circus for a while, so I don't think it's much of a loss from their side of the equation ... but it's really crushing my emotions.
Sucks. To. Be. Me.