March 8th, 2002


a very grey day ....

Yes, it's grey outside, and (as pretty damn much always is the case) it's just as grey inside. I am really very tired. I'm sure part of this is due to having to be up and functioning during those hours that my body prefers to sleep. The little panic attack I had last night (oh, and today too ... dealing with Excel manged to bring up a blast of "bookkeeping phobia" ... bleh) at least makes me think that the Effexor is out of my system. Not happy about this crap. Not happy AT ALL. I had another "the bottom falling away" moment last night when I realized that school does not equall paycheck, and that we're ultimately in as bad shape as ever ... and that we could STILL lose everything before I get hired. Hey, it sucks being me.

However, a prett decent poem seems to have percolated up from all this crap ... and I strongly suggest that you CLICK ON THE LJ-CUT THING that I've started to use to cut down on the line count on these posts. Hey, I'm trying to be NICE here! Want more ugly emotional hemorrhaging? The rest of this stuff is at ... the Archive of my agonies (or something like that).

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