BTRIPP (btripp) wrote,

(sigh) ... why is Xmas always so damn depressing?

OK ... so being out of work at Xmas really sucks since we can't afford shit. Today is also our wedding anniversary, and I'm battered by all the "BUY DIAMONDS" ads that are out there, which makes me feel like crap. Hell, up until just yesterday I hardly had anything for The Wife yet. It's still going to be a real slim Anniversary/Xmas. I've even sunk to re-cycling her old presents (her "free2go" cell phone had expired ... the number went back into the hopper ... and one of the things she's getting is her old phone back with a new number and $25 worth of airtime on it). I don't think that The Girls will notice so much, as they've gotten big box loads of loot from aunts, uncles, and grandparents, but it's eating away at me that I can't do anything special for anybody because I'm such a big fucking loser who has failed at every god-damned thing I've ever tried. Ooops ... there I go, letting the subconscious dialog slip out again.

One thing that's really bugging me is the TREE. The Wife convinced me that we needed to get a tree when we were dating ... and we got this decent looking 6' plastic one about 13 years ago, and have added a massive collection of ornaments to it over the years. Unfortunately, it doesn't look like we're going to be able to "do the tree" this year due to the CAT. I would typically have the tree "done" the weekend following Daughter #1's birthday, but this year, I got the tree up, got the lights on it, and suddenly Dusty Rose decided that this was the Most Fun Cat Toy Ever. Over the first couple of days, she knocked it clear over a dozen times ... I then bolted it down to a 3x3' sheet of pegboard, which stabilized it somewhat (the poor angel keeps keeling over, though), but the downside of that is that the cat now can ascend the inside of the tree and get herself situated on the "branches" (which, of course, being of the artificial sort are nice smooth, level, evenly-spaced metal bars coming out from the center post, just fine for holding up a kitty).

Right now the living room is a mass of boxes, with all the Xmas decor waiting to go up ... but I'm thinking that's not going to happen. We certainly don't want to put up any of the breakable ornaments on the tree, and the way she's going at stuff there, I doubt that anything we put there would survive long (aside from the "dislodge the branches in transit" factor). Most of these boxes are ornaments, so I'm in a quandary about what to do ... we will need at some point to "de-box" the living room but the ideal of putting anything fragile out is unpromising. The Wife suggested that we just do ribbons or something on the tree this year, and we may have to settle for that.

The cat decided that she'd help me illustrate this post ... I was going out to take a picture of "our poor bedraggled tree" when she decided to get involved. In the first pic is the tree as I found it this morning, angel hanging off the side, holes where branches are dislodged, light strings hanging off, etc. ... note the cat approachng amid the fake pine "pole trim" pieces she's pulled off. The second one is of said cat occupying the mid-tree area and enjoying the view. The third, of course, is the culprit, with a "WHAT?" look on her face.

It's so depressing to see the tree like this ... it's hard to tell from these, but when set up properly (not having large sections smooshed down by feline climbing attempts) and decorated it looks very nice and cheerful, but I don't think there's a prayer of that happening this year.

Our old kitty, Nikki, had never made a serious attempt at the tree, even in her "younger" days (we got the tree when she was about 7), so we really didn't have to do much ... I did have a 2'-high fence around it for a while to keep The Girls out when they were younger, but the only problem that Nikki gave us was gnawing on the ribbons, etc. once the presents were out. I could have a 6' fence around the tree now and Dusty would still get in there (she still has her front claws and it is amaing what she can climb!), and even if I was pulling in a substantial income, I don't think I'd feel like building a floor-to-ceiling plexiglass shield around the tree (which is pretty much what we need at the moment).

Of course, I've been grumpy as hell, and have more than once opined that we should "just fucking cancell Xmas!", but it's frustrating as hell having things "half done".

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